"First Customer of the Day"

In the fall of 1983, I got orders for a one year remote at Suwon AFB. South Korea, and would be leaving in the winter. The timing couldn't have been BETTER!

I had just re-enlisted for the last five years I intended to serve. By the time I got BACK, I'd have just slightly over 3 and a half years left on my enlistment. They normally left you in-place for at least ONE year, before they'd hit you up for a long overseas tour again, if they were going to.

This meant that if they DID hit me again for another long one after that, I wouldn't have enough time left to TAKE it, without voluntarily EXTENDING.

If I refused to do THAT, the Air Force would merely deny my re-enlistment in September of '88. Fine with ME, because I was eligible to retire in September of 86, if I chose to, and could do so whenever it suited me.

So one way or the other. Korea would be my last overseas tour.

But this ALSO meant an opportunity to FINALLY get off the F-111 for GOOD........maybe. They were flying the A-10 Warthog at Suwon. I would have to re-train at Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and would pick up a second Identifier Code in my records, which might give me a shot to work A-10's at another stateside base, when I came home from Korea.

Wow...........after working so much overtime over the "Aardvark years"........just the THOUGHT of working my last few years on "mechanic-friendly" airplane for once, became the thought that dreams are made of.

This is what I was thinking at the time, anyway.

Leave it to my buddy Scrubby............when I told him I was headed to Suwon, he said to avoid the "Great venereal disease."............"The Great venereal disease??"............"Yeah!" he said........."GONE-TO-K'REA!!"

One of the last things I remember before I left for Suwon, was old "Sunrise." Anybody out there remember HIM? He was that old Hungarian guy who had that old two-wheel cart with the mule pulling it and the three dogs. He'd park along the road, put signs out, protesting EVERYTHING! He moved around quite a bit.

December 1983.............when I walked off that 747 in Seoul, it was COLD. Korea is COLD. All the war stories you ever read or heard about the Korean War and the cold winters there are TRUE. The base was expecting a LOAD of us replacements when we flew the short hop to Osan (about 6 miles from Suwon). They loaded us up on one of those old "blue goose" Air Force buses, and about a half hour later, we were processing in.

I was a TSgt at the time, (E-6), and although I was initially assigned to A-10 tail number 244.........I barely got to turn a meaningful wrench when they put me in one of the "bread-van" trucks as a flightline expediter. That's what I did for my entire year, and I wasn't overly thrilled about it either.

The duty at Suwon was pretty good, though.........the A-10 rarely broke for anything, so there wasn't a lot of overtime to be worked, and there was RARELY any weekend duty that would amount to anything.

Off-duty time was very good, especially going into the souvenir shops. You could always "negotiate a price", especially if you were the "First customer of the day." You'd walk around, maybe find an ornate robe or bedspread comforter........decide to maybe go across the street and look in another store, and the owner of the shop you were already standing in would rush over to make you that "one-time-good-deal"........."SPECIAL DEAL FOR YOU.......YOU FIRST CUSTOMER OF DAY!".................(it might be three in the afternoon), but..........."YOU FIRST CUSTOMER OF DAY!!.....YOU LIKE??......I MAKE SPECIAL PRICE!"

You'd get to "haggling" a little bit, and finally YOU would say "WHAT'S BEST PRICE TODAY?" and you'd usually come out of there with a pretty good deal.

NOTE----------(when I came back a year later, I was at a K-Mart. I'd picked up a car floormat set.....I think it was $9.95 or something like that.........I walked up to the cashier, and out of SHEER HABIT, asked her "WHAT'S BEST PRICE TODAY?"

She looked at the tag and calmly said "nine ninety five." I felt like a fool, and could only just imagine what the guy in line behind me must have thought!)

Back to Korea...........I had two memorable in-country trips while I was at Suwon. One to Kuni Range and the other to Panmunjom (the DMZ).

Kuni range wasn't far from Osan, and about a dozen of us got to go out there one day and watch the A-10's dive-in on old derelict tanks and half-tracks. IMPRESSIVE to say the least! A Warthog would swoop across the range, turn that big 30mm gatling gun loose, and the old trucks would just sit there and "dance" as pieces flew EVERYWHERE!

Panmunjom (I'm not 100% sure I spelled that right, and I can't find it in the dictionary), was something ELSE, though. It was a military compound that sat directly on the DMZ that separated North & South Korea.

Each side kept "checks and balances" on the other, so only a certain number of personnel could be on their own side of the compound at any given time. The "tours" up there were very infrequent, so you had to sign up for it.........and if you GOT to go, you also had to sign a paper that you would NOT hold our government accountable for any personal injuries or deaths, if something DID happen to break out between the two sides while you were there.

Most of us who initially signed up for the trip STILL wanted to go! We were briefed before we left, along the way, and when we GOT there, on "proper diplomatic behavior."

Photos were permitted, even of the North Korean guards, but NO GESTURES OF ANY KIND TOWARD THEM! You might "feel" like slipping one of them "the bird".......but you had BETTER NOT!

We got off the bus at the "Bridge of No Return." This was an old stone footbridge that was open to foot traffic ONLY for a short time during the "cease-fire" (The Korean War has NEVER officially ended). Only a "cease fire", since neither side would concede defeat.

The deal WAS.......if you were a North Korean wanting to go SOUTH, or a South Korean wanting to go NORTH, you crossed over THAT bridge.......and once over, you could never go back. I don't remember how long they said that bridge was kept open, but it wasn't for very long. It is still guarded today on both sides.

There was a large string of small locked buildings, centered by a larger Conference Room, where the two sides meet once a week. The Conference Room was not in use that day and was open to US, but we were pre-warned NOT to touch anything in there, as the North Korean guards would peer though the windows (and they DID).

Linking each building side-by-side to the other was a white concrete strip about 20 feet long. This was the actual border. INSIDE the Conference Room, aligned PERFECTLY with those concrete strips OUTSIDE, were the two long meeting tables, set up with chairs and microphones facing each other at perfect intervals.

We WERE allowed to walk around in the NORTH side of the room, and they told us to PARTICULARLY NOT touch anything on THAT side. As we moved to that side, and our military guide was telling us that THIS is the only time we could actually BE in North Korea, there stood a North Korean soldier, peering-in through the window.........completely stone-faced, no emotion at all. A couple of us nervously raised our cameras, and our guide said "GO AHEAD.....just DON'T make any gestures to him, or try to get him to smile."...............(somewhere in this house, shed or garage, I've GOT that photo).

Then we learned of the STUPID stuff............starting with the small flags on at the ends of the two tables................

After the "cease-fire", those buldings and "Conference Room" were built dead-on the border. At the very first meeting, both sides brought their flags into the room. But at the FOLLOWING meeting, the NORTH brought a BIGGER flag, as an expression of "superiority."

Well, the week after that, the SOUTH brought in a bigger flag than the NORTH had. Inside of a month or so, the flags were getting SO large, they couldn't get 'em through the door! So, "ANOTHER" "cease-fire" had to be established, and they went back to a small "desk flag" siting on the end of each table. The North Korean flag stood a bit higher at the tip, but the South Korean flag was mounted on a higher base. Both sides were ok with that, and that's how it remained from then on. STUPID.

OUTSIDE, on the North side of the border, the North Koreans built a huge 2-story official-looking building, directly facing the south. What the visitor CANNOT see, (because of the shape, terrain and distance), is that this "magnificent" structure is only 13-feet deep! (according to the guide). It's just a facade.......but deep enough to have a shallow stairwell to the second floor, where you can see an occasional North Korean in one of the "second story" windows!

Off in the distance about a mile away is what appears to be a huge village, flying a North Korean flag that is reportedly FIFTY FEET LONG and THIRTY FEET WIDE! There is music coming out of that village that one can faintly hear, but our guide said there are only a handful of people in that whole town..........just to mind the lights P.A. systems and generators!

All for SHOW........."intimidation".............one-UPmanship...........Stupid.

Well, I think THIS one has gone long enough tonight. I'll finish my "GONE-TO-K'REA" tour on the next post.