In a recent conversation with my three son's on the topic of where they live vs where I should live:

21 year old: "I'm going to retire in 6 years and you can come live with me"

Me: " That would be great, just make sure you get a house, so that I can bring my pets"

21 year old: "No, I didn't say anything about pets"

Me: "Come on, it's only five birds. They won't bother you"

21 year old: "No way, mom. "No animals"

Me: "Five birds, five fish tanks, a dog and a cat"

21 year old: "Not a chance. I tell you what, I'll find a nice nursing home for you that will let you have pets"

Me: "I thought you just said that I was going to come live with you, you'll be so rich and build a house in the country, I won't have to work and I can enjoy my retirement"

21 year old: "Gotta go Mom, someone's on the other line, Talk later"

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27 year old: "Hey, Mom, got an idea. The wife and kids and I are going to stay here with you and we can help you when you get old and can't do anything."

Me: "Hey, son -- how about I live here and you guys can stay here with me -- if I need help I'll holler."

27 year old: "By the way, that dog of yours doesn't listen, and gets in the trash. Your parrot screams whenever I try to watch a movie or if the kids are sleeping. Can't you just get rid of them?"

Me: "They just want some attention."

27 year old: "When you get old and go into a nursing home, I'm getting rid of all of them"

Me: "I thought you guys were going to stay and take care of me?"

27 year old: "What, are you senile already? " How am I supposed to take care of you and all the animals, too?"

Me: "Where are you guys going? I thought we were going to sit around and enjoy each other's company?"

27 year old: "We found a house that we like and we're going to find out how fast we can move into it. See you later Mom."

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29 year old: "Hi, Mom what's going on in your part of the world? Did you get my picture that I sent to your cell phone?"

Me: "Yes, but why do you send me one everyday?

29 year old: "You said you liked hearing from me, so I send you a picture to let you know I'm still here."

Me: "Hey, remember that conversation we had one time about me living with you when I'm older? Am I old enough yet?"

29 year old: "Hey Mom, remember there is a reason I moved across country! I gotta go for now, but I'll keep sending you pictures. Talk later, bye."

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How can you not love these guys? How am I going to tell them that I spent their inheritance? Guess I'll just have to send them a picture a day from the first beautiful island that this cruise ship stops at. I'll be looking for my own NURSING HOME!