I know this is not an easy topic for some, and there are some who choose not to approach the subject altogether, but its been weighing a little heavy on my heart lately, so I figured I would write about it.
Forgiveness is a skill that not many, including myself, are able to master. I believe that's because of a few different reasons.
The first reason is that some people seek a reason to distance themselves from others.
The frustration caused by one small slight can pile on top of anger waiting to be let out, anger which already causes that person large amounts of pain. No matter who caused the original event which resulted in so much anger, whoever is the one who places the straw that breaks the camel's back is in for a world of hurt.
People then use this anger and hurt to push others away, including people who could help take away their pain.
The second reason is because it's so difficult to let go of that pain.
Whether it's because people like having something to hold onto or because the root cause is buried so deep, it is extremely difficult to truly let things go. Letting things go doesn't have to mean forgetting the event happened, but it means letting go of the anger and pain caused by said events. It also means letting go of plans for revenge.
An enticing avenue when someone has wronged us, revenge can seem sweet when first thought of. Taking revenge on someone, or getting even, already sets you on the wrong path. When revenge comes into the mix, it turns into a war between you and another person. Each party starts keeping track of what the other person did, keeping score in their own evil game.
Forgiveness can lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you. There's also surprising health benefits, including a healthy boost to your immune system, lower blood pressure and improved heart health.
Move on from whatever caused you so much pain, and you'll be better for it.